Tag Archives: emotional strength

Eliminating Internal Judgment- Part 3

The following post is an excerpt from Frank’s newest book, The Soft Science of Tennis. Click Here to Order through Amazon

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How to Strengthen Self Coaching Solution #4:
Identifying Internal Obstacles

Looking deeper into competitive success brings us to a fourth method, which is assisting athletes by identifying their internal obstacles. Although losing to a more experienced player stings a bit, losing to a toad because you have self-destructed is much more harrowing. The secret to conquering one’s inner demons stems from understanding the importance of self-coaching. It is essential to master self-coaching with positive inner dialog by exchanging judgmental tirades with calming routines and rituals.

 

“Overcoming internal obstacles is more satisfying at a deeper level than beating a top seed.”

 

Athletes perform best when they are not excessively judged or overly concerned about the outcome ramifications. Having outcome goals is fine, as long as their focus is on the process. To continually stay process-minded is the backbone of successful inner dialog. What influences athletes most in their toughest moments is their mental commentary. A healthy mindset orchestrates positive attitude, belief, and effort. So, what is competitive success? Competitive success is performing at one’s peak performance level set after set; the optimum victory for any athlete.

 

How to Strengthen Self Coaching Solution #5:
Monitoring Outer Dialog

The fifth method of nurturing a positive inner dialog is to ask the athlete to monitor their outer dialog under stressful conditions. An athlete’s outer dialog includes speech, body language and physical behavior, which are natural bi-products of an athlete’s internal dialog.

Monitoring this process begins with the athlete recognizing their automatic system of behavior under the stressful conditions of competition. Although it is common to default to old comfortable habits under stress; negative habits not only perpetuate pessimistic thought patterns, they alert the opponent that self-destruction is in the works. Self-spotting outer dialog behavior will help the athlete to recondition their inner dialog chatter.

 

 

How to Strengthen Self Coaching Solution #6:
Resist Attention Seeking Negative Dialog

A behavior management strategy is to coach the athlete to resist attention seeking negative dialog and behavior. Athletes gain sympathy by projecting pessimistic behaviors. A typical example of this is an athlete’s excessively loud mini-tantrum in competition to gain sympathy from spectators, family or coaches. In essence, the athlete is projecting, “I’m usually so much better than this…I must be having an unusually bad day!” Ironically, the tantrum is seen every day.

In my opinion, tactically ignoring the outbursts in hopes that they go away is not dialog management because an appropriate alternate behavior is needed.  An athlete’s dialog projects their thoughts and beliefs. Their voices have been simply programmed into their subconscious. Since they determine the course of their life, reprogramming their negative inner chatter is a battle worth fighting.

 

“Optimistic self-coaching is a wonderful technique to create better human beings on and off the tennis court.”

 

 

Here’s an alternate view of tennis parenting and tennis teaching. The conventional method has been to feel balls, criticize what’s broken and then focus on the athlete’s problem areas. This judgment based approach isn’t always in the student’s best interest. Why? Because it subliminally plants the toxic seeds of negative inner dialog and in competition, this learned behavior of focusing on what’s wrong opposes the natural flow state found in nonjudgmental, effortless, peak performance. Seeking “what is broken” isn’t part of performing in the zone or “treeing” as today’s juniors describe playing at one’s optimal level.

 

How the Brain Affects Performance- Part 4

The following post is an excerpt from
Frank’s newest book,

THE SOFT SCIENCE OF TENNISSoft Science of Tennis_3D_Cover_version5 

Click Here to Order eBook for only 2.99!  

SALE price through July 10

 

This chapter will uncover how brain design affects tennis performances. The following brain design categories can be used as an informal observation as you first profile yourself. However, I suggest going online to the dozens of more in-depth questionnaires. Choose the accuracy and depth of the personality profiling questionnaire that is right for you. After a bit of research, you will recognize learning preferences that best describe your brain design.

Let’s review the basics from earlier in this book. There are 16 configurations of personality profiles found around the world. By completing your chosen questionnaire, you will discover your association – a 4-letter acronym nicknaming your personality profile. Once comfortable with the terminology, you will be able to categorize your athletes into their unique design. Following is a list of commonalities I’ve uncovered on-court with my high-performance students.

Judgers (J) versus Perceivers (P)

  • Judger Students
  • Prefer planned, orderly structured lessons.
  • Often postpone competing because they’re not 100% ready.
  • Are frequently afraid to make the wrong decision, so they freeze up in competition.
  • Need closure with a task before moving onto the next drill.
  • Enjoy making detailed lists to ensure productivity.
  • Have a strong need to control most aspects of situations.
  • Change is uncomfortable and is typically shunned.
  • Multitasking is avoided as they prefer to focus on one component at a time.
  • Rules and laws apply to them and everyone else in the academy.
  • Often closed-minded to new information until its proven correct.
  • Often more-fixed-mind-set versus growth-mind-set.
  • Self-regulated and enjoy working their customized developmental plan.

 

Perceiver Students

  • In competition, perceivers are mentally found in the future, not the present.
  • Often struggle with closing out leads in matches.
  • Day-dream and often struggle with remaining on task.
  • Are flexible and spontaneous.
  • Easily adapt to the ever-changing match situations.
  • Open to discussing and applying new, unproven concepts.
  • Often more growth-mindset versus fixed-mind-set.
  • Appear relaxed and loose under stress.
  • Perform in cycles of energy.
  • Typically need goal dates and deadlines to work hard.
  • In matches, focus on outcome scenarios versus performance play.
  • Often postpone training until the last minute.

 

“Athletes who make the most significant gains are independent thinkers who are self-aware of their inborn characteristics, strengths, and weaknesses. Understanding your player’s personality profile will enrich your relationships and assist you in helping your students develop excellent technique, athleticism, strategies and handling stress under pressure.”

 

Take a few moments, sit back and digest the above information. I’m sure you will smile as you systematically place specific students, co-workers, friends and family members into their genetic predispositions.

In chapters 8- 11, four customized challenges and their solutions are provided for each of the sixteen personality profiles.

How the Brain Affects Performance- Part 3

The following post is an excerpt from
Frank’s newest book,

THE SOFT SCIENCE OF TENNISSoft Science of Tennis_3D_Cover_version5 

Click Here to Order eBook for only 2.99!  

SALE price through July 10

This chapter will uncover how brain design affects tennis performances. The following brain design categories can be used as an informal observation as you first profile yourself. However, I suggest going online to the dozens of more in-depth questionnaires. Choose the accuracy and depth of the personality profiling questionnaire that is right for you. After a bit of research, you will recognize learning preferences that best describe your brain design.

Let’s review the basics from earlier in this book. There are 16 configurations of personality profiles found around the world. By completing your chosen questionnaire, you will discover your association – a 4-letter acronym nicknaming your personality profile. Once comfortable with the terminology, you will be able to categorize your athletes into their unique design. Following is a list of commonalities I’ve uncovered on-court with my high-performance students.

Thinkers (T) versus Feelers (F)

  • Thinker Students
  • Impersonalize tennis matches in a business fashion.
  • Continually analyze the pros and cons of each situation.
  • Thrive in private lessons versus group activities.
  • In discussions, they are frank and often void of tactfulness.
  • Aware of coaching inconsistencies.
  • In competition, they are less influenced by emotions than other brain designs.
  • Prefer logical explanations versus hunches.
  • Relate to technical skills training over mental or emotional skills training.
  • Less concerned about personal interaction and group harmony.
  • Prefer work before play even in practice.
  • Value fairness and good sportsmanship.
  • Often seen as uncaring or indifferent to others.

 

Feeler Students

  • Enjoy group sessions with their peers.
  • Often put others needs ahead of their own.
  • Strong need for optimism and harmony on-court.
  • Struggle with match play cheating and gamesmanship.
  • Usually outcome-oriented versus process-oriented.
  • Perform with their heart versus their head.
  • Often miss the details and facts in problem-solving.
  • Sometimes too empathetic to struggling opponents.
  • Need frequent process reminders to regain focus.

 

“A gender stereotype myth is that females are feelers and males are thinkers. While the exact percentages vary widely from study to study, it’s clear that brain function doesn’t necessarily correlate with gender. Nature versus nurture falls into play.

Though societal bias may nurture females to be more nurturing and caring and males to be more tough problem-solvers, females can be genetically wired to be thinkers just as males can be wired to be feelers.”

Handling Adversity- Part Two

The following post is an excerpt from Emotional Aptitude In Sports NOW available through most online retailers!  Click Here to Order

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Champions view handling adversity in a different light. They understand that winners have taken the time to develop their emotional muscles. They’ve been through the fires and have come out stronger. Hardships must not be avoided but embraced.  Please realize that athletes who seek greatness need bitter rivals, demanding coaches, bad referees, and even those cheating opponents because they all require the athlete to push beyond their comfort zones. These experiences help them later perform at a higher level under intense pressure.

With distance comes clarity. After a difficult experience, athletes discover that their seemingly horrific experience actually motivated them to improve by training and preparing more efficiently. Handling hardships stoke the competitive fire. That is why this section is important in regards to emotional aptitude.

 

Becoming comfortable handling conflict is emotional aptitude.

 

So I sat down again with my students, Evan and Jarrod. We discussed unfair hardships and here’s what they had to say.

 

Question: Why do athletes need rivals?

Evan: Rivals are actually secret partners in a different uniform. They’re the motivational force every athlete needs. My rival’s improvements push me towards my own improvement.

Jarrod: That’s stupid! Dude, I’d have so many trophies, if it weren’t for you. Besides, I think life would be easier if all my opponents were horrible.

Question: Why do athletes need demanding coaches?

Evan: Demanding coaches push you further than you think you can go. They have a vision of who you can be. They teach respect … respect for yourself, the equipment and others. Demanding coaches can be positive, fun loving … BTW- A screaming, abusive coach does not motivate me!

Jarrod: Hum… I’ve got no respect for those old fashion, drill sergeant negatrons. My old coach only pointed out the problems. Every training session was him telling me why I stink. I don’t remember him offering solutions… Only pointing out mistakes and why I’m a loser.

Emotional Aptitude In Sports

The following post is an excerpt from Emotional Aptitude In Sports NOW available through most online retailers!  Click Here to Order

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Competitive athletes are found in almost every corner of the globe. It is common to see National Championships in every age division from 9 years old to 90 years young and in almost every sport imaginable. In today’s competitive athletic arena, emotional aptitude is essential.  Most players enter the game intently focused on improving technical (fundamentals), mental (strategic) and athletic components. Unfortunately, emotional control supersedes athletic, mental and fundamental development during competition.  Under-developed emotional skill sets debilitate an athlete’s developed strengths- just when they are needed the most…  Remember the quote?

 

“It’s not the size of the dog in the fight, it’s the size of the fight in the dog.”
                                                     Mark Twain

 

My bet is that Mark Twain was referring to emotional aptitude. Emotional Aptitude in Sports delves into why athletes with seemingly solid games continue to lose … and lose often as a result of choking and/or panicking under stress. My fascination with this common athletic obstacle led me to research the science of emotional intelligence. It was the work of Peter Salovey and John D. Mayer in 1980’s that inspired NY Times writer Daniel Goleman to write the groundbreaking book, Emotional Intelligence. Goleman collaborated with David McClelland, who was among a group of Harvard researchers interested in cognitive intelligence versus emotional intelligence. Goleman argued that it was not cognitive intelligence that guaranteed business success but emotional intelligence.

Given the importance of emotional intelligence in business success, I began to see the similarity emotional intelligence had on athletes- separating the successful athlete from the unsuccessful athletes. I found that unsuccessful athletes don’t necessarily lack technique, but lack emotional aptitude- which often holds them hostage. Decades of observation has proven to me that strong emotional aptitude is far more important than perfect form in athletic competition. At the higher levels of sports, every athlete has solid fundamentals. Despite being incredibly talented individuals, in the heat of battle, tremendous athletic assets abandon those that lack developed emotional skill sets.

In competitive sports, the parameters in which players are expected to perform are far different than repetitive non-stressful practice environments. Athletes expecting to perform identical series of movements/skills mastered in practice are often disappointed in actual competition.

Competition inherently involves uncontrollable variables that require the adjustment of form. Examples include:

  • The Athlete’s Physical, Mental or Emotional State on the Day of Competition
  • Different Speeds, Spins, Angles and Trajectories of Incoming Balls
  • Different Speeds, Spins, Angles and Trajectories of Outgoing Balls
  • The Athlete’s Body Language, Balance, and Stability
  • Different Strategic and Tactical Options Required
  • Varying Environmental Conditions
  • Playing Surface Variations
  • Movement Issues From Standing Still to the Dead Run
  • Time Management (Less Time/More Time Available)
  • Minute Body Link Variations and Adjustments
  • Opponent’s Styles, Position and Skill Sets

 

In most sports, adaptable techniques are repeatable sequences of expectations, anticipation, reaction, movement, spacing, coordination and balance followed
by biomechanically efficient fundamentals.

 

The pressure of competition increases the need for strong emotional aptitude. I believe a missing link in many players’ developmental routines is not understanding when to shift focus from “perfect form” to “solid form with adaptable technique” under the pressure of competition. Far too many intermediate athletes continue to devote 100% of their time and energy toward perfecting technique and ignoring emotional skill set training.  Failure to recognize the importance of performance under stress stunts an athlete’s growth.  How an athlete handles adapting to the variables of competition under stress requires strong emotional aptitude.

In my opinion, athletes, parents, and coaches obsessed with one-dimensional training are stuck in the slow lane to greatness… hoping for no roadblocks along the way. While those in the fast lane are developing the preset protocols to maneuver around those roadblocks which maximize player potential at the quickest rate.

 

Emotional Aptitude in Sports serves as a wakeup call for anyone who is tired of coming up short in competition and is ready to do something about it.  Welcome to a greater understanding of you!

 

Solutions to Foster Emotional Strength

The following post is an excerpt from Emotional Aptitude In Sports NOW available through most online retailers!  Click Here to Order

 

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EMOTIONAL DEVELOPMENT

Elite competitors are confident that their superior emotional strength will override any hardships and physical limitations. The emotionally weak athletes are convinced that the unfair hardships and their perceived limitations will override their peak performance
and catastrophe will once again occur.

 

An old-school word used to describe emotional aptitude is Grit. In regards to high achievers, researchers have come to the conclusion that successful individuals possess traits deeper than the mastery of athletic ability.  Grit is persistent courage, resolve, and strength of character. Grit is the learned ability to have “nerves of steel,” fortitude and determination. Interestingly, some athletes are pre-wired to have these essential components and some are not. For those athletes who are not natural combatants, developing emotional aptitude is critical.

Sadly, emotionally weak competitors often ignore the development of such skills.  Cultivating these character traits is what propels the few into the winners’ circle. If you believe that your emotions are holding you hostage on game day and keeping you from the success you deserve, I suggest focusing your attention on the below list of solutions

Posted Below are Five of Fifteen Solutions to Foster Emotional Strength.

  1. Nurture the Love of Competition
    Studies show that experiences bring more joy than possessions. The energy of the event is contagious. Athletes should enjoy competing against their past, fatigue, opponents and against time.
  2. Commit to Improving
    Being the best of the best (even in your town) doesn’t come without extreme effort. Improve your performance by understanding emotional aptitude.
  3. Recognize That You Can’t Be Normal …and a Champion
    Champions lead very different lives than normal people. Being an athletic champion is a daily lifestyle.
  4. Customize Your Training
    Realize that diligent customized training trumps social, group learning. Research shows, on average, group training takes up to six times longer than quality private training.
  5. Adopt a Growth Mind-Set
    Great skills are cultivated through continuous effort more so than initial talent or IQ. Without effort…you fail by default. Understand that success starts with the effort of optimism and a growth mindset.

Competitive Dramas: Internal Struggles

The following post is an excerpt from the Second Edition of The Tennis Parent’s Bible NOW available through most on-line retailers!  Click Here to Order

 

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QUESTION: What does emotional conduct have to do with winning?

 

Frank:  Maintaining peak performance is dependent on a player’s emotional intelligence. Let’s look deeper into where an athlete’s focus shifts during competition when they leave their optimal performance state of mind.

Optimal emotional conduct is a performance state of mind which allows a competitor to reach and maintain their peak performance level. It’s important to note that even though stroke mechanics are solidified in a non-stressful practice environment, poor emotional control can cause solid fundamentals to faultier under stressful match conditions.

“Pre-setting appropriate solutions is emotional readiness.”

Champions in their optimal emotional state of mind report being very happy, confident, dialed into the moment, flowing not forcing, feeling confident, safe and secure, performing on script, being ready and optimistic about the match.

Often the difference between a great competitor and good competitor is the understanding and implementation of their optimal emotional conduct.

“Average athletes unknowingly drift in and out of their competitive script – floating through their under and over arousal state of mind. This instability allows their performance level to drop significantly.”

Very few athletes have been taught to be aware of their emotional state of being. An athlete’s optimal emotional state is dependent on their ability to spot their under-arousal and the over-arousal states of mind.

Foster Emotional Strength

The following post is an excerpt from Emotional Aptitude In Sports NOW available through most on-line retailers!  Click Here to Order

ea-in-sports4a_final

 

Five More Solutions to Foster Emotional Strength

Nurture the Love of Competition
Studies show that experiences bring more joy than possessions. The energy of the event is contagious. Athletes should enjoy competing against their past, fatigue, opponents and against time.

Commit to Improving
Being the best of the best (even in your town) doesn’t come without extreme effort. Improve your performance by understanding emotional aptitude.

Recognize That You Can’t Be Normal …and a Champion
Champions lead very different lives than normal people. Being an athletic champion is a daily lifestyle.

Customize Your Training
Realize that diligent customized training trumps social, group learning. Research shows, on average, group training takes up to six times longer than quality private training.

Adopt a Growth Mind-Set
Great skills are cultivated through continuous effort more so than initial talent or IQ.  Without effort…you fail by default. Understand that success starts with the effort of optimism and a growth mindset.